Monday, February 6, 2012

Hot Mama's

When I gave birth to Marlin 10 years ago, little did I know how much a hospital provided support group would be a gift that kept on giving.
I remember the foggy day after having her. I remember trying to rapidly figure out my new baby and my bizarre science experimenty, magical, lactating body.
I recall the exhausted, body on auto pilot, numbness that sets deep into your over the moon happy soul in the blur of, "I just had a baby".
I had so many questions about breast feeding. It was my deepest desire to successfully have my body continue to nourish this baby. I did not want to screw it up. I had no idea if I was doing it right. The nurses set up an appointment with Lynn, the lactation consultant. She walked in and showed me the ropes. She answered all of my questions, she popped in so many times to check on us. She told me about a weekly group she hosted at the hospital.
It was for new Mothers.
It would be nice to get out and meet others, she said. There will questions, she said.
I skipped the first one. I was tired. It was winter. Marlin was teeny. There were viruses out there.
 But by week two, I needed to go. There were so many mommies, and babies, and booby feeders. There was Lynn's smile and soft words. There were Mommies with issues, and Mommies with awesome suggestions. There were all these others women who were living in the same but different. I never missed a meeting.
You stayed in that group for the first 3 months and then you were supposed to move on to make room for the new Mom's.
I needed my weekly meet up.
 So I talked to some others, and set it up. We were going to rotate houses and meet once a week! It was awesome. This went on for 5 years. After most of the kids went off to school we met on vacations, and at the beach during the summer. We morphed from a group of 7 ish women and babes to over a 11. We average 2- 3 kids per family. Some of the families have moved away. We still meet, mostly the Mom's, at restaurants about twice a year.
This year was our tenth anniversary. We needed a celebration...
A Mama's father had a good sized house in a beach side town. We planned to take the the original babies and all the mamas, and spend a weekend together to celebrate.
It was just not possible to take all the siblings.
 No worries, all those kids had really special plans, and lovely times with their Dad's. It worked out wonderfully.
We had an amazing time together.
 Some of these kids had not seen each other in 2-3 years! But there was just something in the very cells of each other that immediately recognized these other kids.
It was lovely. It was old times. It was like it had always continued.
Our first night together was this: IMG 0758 IMG 0760 IMG 0762
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 Saturday morning:
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 Sunday Morning was mostly cleaning and packing. The kids played and played.
 And giggled at all the nakey pictures in the Vanity Fair Photo book.
Which is an awesome book.

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 We went to a little beach to collect momentos, and to say farewell:

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 Some of us went out for beach food:
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 Marlin and I came home and collapsed in that good kind of exhausted. These women are part of something deep inside of me. We have been in the trenches together, we have cried both happy and sad tears together. We have some kind of a military, ya ya, steel magnolia, I don't know what.. IMG 0850

 But our connection runs deep.
It's magical, and it will grow as old and sliver as the hairs popping up on my head.
There will be weddings. And other events that will unfold as time runs course.
 But one thing I can predict for sure...
There will be a bunch of loud old ladies, howling at private jokes, swearing like banshee's, clinking the glasses somewhere in the world one day.
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 And people will just have roll their eye's at the "Mama's".
  Because they have no idea.

1 comment:

Jessica said...

This post has stayed with me all day. It takes effort to keep a group of women together and strong for 10 years. I have one friend who, like your friends, I imagine still talking every other day or so when we are old and in our rockers. We have been through so much, I can't imagine not having her to listen to me! This weekend was a gift that will be a part of you and Marlin forever.